May 17, 2011

on being thirty...

Last night, two girls guessed that I was 23.  That felt good.  But this other woman, who is probably in her early 40's, kept calling me honey.  That did not feel so good.  I wanted to shout at her that I am thirty and you don't call people who are 30 honey anymore.  When I told Nick both of these stories, he said that I can't have it both ways.  Whatever.


So, my opinion of thirty is that it kind of sucks.


I am getting wrinkles.  I started using wrinkle cream, but I fear it is too late.


When Amy was editing our Christmas card picture this last year, she was removing the wrinkles and dark circles under my eyes.  She was flashing back and forth between the before and after pictures when my mom walked in.  When my mom looked at the screen, she asked Amy why she kept putting those dark marks under my eyes.  Yeah, so if you saw our Christmas card picture, now you know that it was one big fat lie.  And the really pathetic thing is that I still have wrinkles in the picture even after the editing.
The original picture, wrinkles and all.

But that is besides the point.


That is not the reason why I think thirty sucks. 


Thirty sucks because it makes me think about all the things that I have not accomplished yet in my life.  Okay, really it makes me think about one thing I have not accomplished yet.


I keep meeting people who have kids, like multiple kids.  And when I meet them, I automatically assume they are older than me.  Then, I find out they are either my age or younger.  This automatically sends me into a flustered panic and gives me a serious inferiority complex.


I don't have kids yet, at least not human ones. This is quite obvious, since you see doggy pictures instead of kid pictures on this blog.  Just know that i would rather be showing you cute babies than cute dogs.  But, for complicated reasons that are beyond my control and that I won't go into at the moment, I don't have cute babies yet.


Being 30 reminds me of that fact.


If it was up to me, babies would be abundant in our abode.


I just thought you should know.  Because I know that when people are thirty and have been married for 5 years, other people start to wonder.  Maybe it makes me feel a little less inferior to have you know that.


And I guess if I look like I'm 23, then waiting a little longer to have kids is not the end of the world.  I just have to make my uterus believe that it is only 23 too.
Me when I really was 23.


4 comments:

  1. Ah! I love your honesty, Mindy! Three cheers for dealing with disappointment honestly and then finding a new dream to move toward and pray for. And I'm praying you get to have lots of kiddos in your house! I cracked up when you used the word "adobe". Unless you and Nick use that as a nickname for you house, I figured you meant to say abode- maybe you've been teaching about the missions for too long. =o)

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  2. I agree...love the honest post, though not your disappointment.

    The photo of you at 23, you look 14. Seriously.

    Not that glasses make me look younger, but I find that they hide my deep, under-eye wrinkles and bags some. Maybe I should start wearing them on top of my head to cover the gray though.

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  3. Melinda Ann, I've lived your disappointment, but believe me, God will not leave you alone and your dream for children will be realized. It is true that when one door closes, He opens another one. There are lots of doors out there in the baby world. God will tell you when it's the right time to choose. I love you so much.

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  4. min,
    your babies will be beautiful.
    -cort

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